You can't have your cake, and eat it too!

I have a problem. What problem, you ask?
I have realized a lot lately, that I am very frequently #2. Here, let me explain by trying to paint you a little picture. It goes a little something like this: Girl meets boy. Boy flirts with girl. Girl gets excited and hopeful. Boy flirts a little more. Excitement still building. The, WHAM! Girl finds out that boy is not actually single. Balloon popped.

Boys: I ask you, what is it with you with wanting your cake and eating it to? Why do you flirt (from mild to stronggg flirtations) with another girl, when you have a girlfriend? Are you unhappy? Are you confused? Are you just using me to boost your ego, to remind yourself that you've still got "it"? I suspect it is likely the later. Have you no heart? Do you not realize that you're playing with someones emotions?

I ask you this, how would you feel if the roles were reversed?? Wouldn't you be upset if you knew that your girlfriend was flirting with other men just to validate herself?

Listen, I'm not trying to claim that women are perfect and that no woman in time has ever done this. But I'm not talking about them. I'm talking about you.

I just really want, for once in my life, to be the girl the boy is excited about. I want him to be single. I want him to be available. I can only stay hopeful that maybe someday, this wish will come true. Until then, guys, please stop thinking with your junk and start thinking with your brain.

**To all of my lady readers who's man liked it so much he put a ring on it, aren't you glad you don't have to deal with this shit anymore?!

NYC dating anecdotes 1

I'm going to go out on a limb here and talk about something I haven't done (this publically) before... Take it for what you will, and enjoy the trials and tid bits from my dating life....

So I went on an OKcupid date (as all of my dates are these days) some time ago with John (name has been changed).
I messaged the him first.
Our messages were just so-so. Nothing too exciting.

Then John asked me if I wanted to go to a movie for our first date. Ugh. Why do guys do this? What makes them think that I would want to sit in a dark theater with them if we've never met before??

I never that was excited to meet him. So that can't be a good sign... But then as I was thinking as I was walking to the restaurant, maybe I've just gone on too many damn OKCupid dates, that go nowhere to get nervous at this point?

John picked a restaurant in the Village. I was excited and irritated at the same time by this because I had to be up so early the next morning (which we had discussed), but rarely go down to that part of the city so I was looking forward to exploring a new spot.

John more or less ordered for the both of us which, kind of annoyed me. Also because he asked me what looked good, I gave him my opinion, and then he ordered something completely different. He ordered veggies... which I'm not a fan of and never would have ordered, but they ended up being tasty, so OK, I'll cut him some slack there.

To drink, he ordered four of what the restaurant called the "Recession Special"- a PBR, a shot of whisky with a pickle back. By the end of the night, he was visibly tipsy. I had 3 glasses of prosecco, so I wasn't exactly Sober Sally, but not near on his level.

Our banter was witty and rarely left much of a pause in between subjects... until the end of the night when it felt like we had asked all of the questions there was to ask.

I was looking forward to going home.
Then I find out, he's riding the same train as me... almost the entire way. Ugh.

As we waited on the platform for the train, I stood with my arms crossed... my typical/comfortable stance and he told me I should stop doing that because it made me look very closed off. Ouch.

Then when we were on the train, I twirled my hair and John asked if I always do that... I asked if I had done it a lot throughout the night, and he said yes. The way he asked made it seem like it annoyed him. Um, sorry?

I was shocked when the next day, and days following he continued to text me, asking when we could see each other again. As I'm sure you can tell from the above story, I wasn't really feeling it, so needless to say, I never did see him again.